I have an issue. My problem is with emoji.

Currently — and I just counted — there are twenty fat yellow thumbs in response to my last text to something or someone. I am all for efficiency and speed but here’s my thinking: what actually DOES this thumb mean?

“Yes, I read it?”

“Yeah, that sounds good?”

“Ok, that plan works?”

“Got the invoice, will settle?”

“Miss you too?”

“Thanks for making that happen?”

Just to cite a few interpretations. But my problem is I interpret this particular emoji as “I don’t have the time to actually communicate with you so this will have to do.” Well.

No one uses email or even posted mail these days so short efficient texts keeps me in touch with so many people. Don’t get me wrong I love tacking on emoji I mean there is even a BALL OF YARN emoji and a turtle and a lacrosse stick and a hairdryer and a steaming cup of coffee to name a few. These are really fun ones to jolly up a text, but that’s after I have used a few words in letters. So am I not worth actual words that convey the emotion/message you would like me to know?

Maybe I am too literal. I did terribly on multiple choice exams, finding a reason to check all the boxes if I thought hard enough. I want to be clear: I treasure our communications and take the time with my answers. But the key here is ‘communication.’

This particular emoji maybe ALL of them have dumbed us down; it actually takes less time to type a response than to search for that emoji and click on it. Try it.

It gives me a feeling of loss that we can’t use words anymore. So much is being lost right now, cultural and emotionally, politically and financially. We need to work really hard to keep being human together.

It’s a very ugly thumb. Even the heart emoji is better. Thanks for listening.