We made it.
I woke up on January 1 and said hello you and did not get out of bed to see the sunrise over the harbor. Because I was tired. And I am enough as is, with more tea and a grand dog and the beautiful pink sky visible from my bedroom window. No matter what your travel, family or virus status has been for the last month, we came out on the other side. Stand tall.
The new year is just the old one with new numbers. I sit at my desk January 3rd with so many emails, piles of ideas and a few deadlines. There is a re-knit to finish, a literary submission and a bio to edit for a publication date. I had to push away bits of wrapping paper and an old cup of tea to find my pad. I made a list and prioritized. Tomorrow is plenty of time to tackle the second line.
‘Tis the season of re-do and frankly, I have been redone, remade and restarted enough times that me — all taste-less, smell-less, tired and lover-of-fruitcake-me, is fine, thank you. Take it all with a grain of salt, in fact, take THIS with a grain of salt, because we have been through enough to recognize the pointlessness of weight-loss pressures, or sales pitches or self-improvement bombardment. We made it, remember. Just as we are.
My word for the year is Brave. In my health, my writing and my desires. I will not entertain doubt because after all, here I am world. See my feathers unfurl.
It could be ugly. But I will know I tried.
Tea today with a friend I missed seeing over the holidays: I am bringing fruitcake, made by monks, a splendid cake studded with candied gems. We will roll our eyes and enjoy every bite, laughing over the days we made our own and coddled them on the kitchen counter for months, swaddled in linen and bathed weekly in booze. Let the monks enjoy that process now; I plan to pry the lid off and cut a big chunk to accompany our Earl Grey.
Meet yourself where you are today. And tomorrow. And beyond. This first month is really just the same old/new/wondrous month as the next. Do what you can; a new twist on bravery AND joy is ahead.
I look forward to hearing about it.